Happy Hostess

The following is the picture of what a Happy Hostess should look like.

I think that I would be perfectly happy being pleasantly tipsy all day and hosting parties at my home. If there's any way that I could get a job that would pay me to do this, I'd never want for anything else. What can I say? I moved to New York because I heard tale that all people do here is get pleasantly tipsy and work in cool modern offices and do lines off the receptionist's desk. That's why people here never sleep.