And I start my new job on Monday.
And I'm nervous because I've been at this job for almost 3 years and I know everyone so well and Monday I'm going to have to start from scratch and be the new girl. I like making new friends and I'm not shy but I do get nervous sometimes. What if people are bitches, what if no one talks to me, what if someone eats my yogurt out of the fridge because they don't know that I am forgetful with labeling things--lots of things are running through my mind right now.
But its absolutely gorgeous outside and I'm having a Happy Hour House Party at my apartment after work so I think this is going to be a good Friday.
Friday, February 27, 2009
I've always had a type
In 2nd grade there was a big poster on the wall of all the US presidents. I was always drawn to one picture in particular on the poster--the pic of our 14th president Mr. Franklin Pierce. I thought he was super handsome and was disappointed that the current president Ronald Reagan was such an decrepit old fart.
He was apparently one of the worst presidents in US history.
But he is also kind of adorable.
He was apparently one of the worst presidents in US history.
But he is also kind of adorable.
I bring this up because I just had this conversation:
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Hey guess what?
So in case you didn't know, the fates work in mysterious ways.
On Friday I got a call around 5:45pm about a job. I called back and got voicemail. So I decided I would deal with it on Monday.
On Monday I'd kind of forgotten that I ever got that Friday evening call and I didn't get a return call so I figured it was a wash.
On Tuesday I found out that my show isn't getting renewed and that my last day of work would be March 20th. I immediately began to panic and was already imagining myself living in a shanty town in Central Park and hunting squirrel meat. So I called the woman from Friday back even though I felt like a douche because I hadn't tried her on Monday. Turns out she was very nice and informed me that she had my resume for a position that was opening up at the History Channel and that they were doing phone interviews and would probably be calling people in within the next couple of weeks. We chatted for ten minutes or so and before she hung up she said, "I'll probably give you a ring next week to let you know either way if we're going to have you come in for a one on one."
Ten minutes after that my interviewer called again. "Actually, do you have time this week to come in? Like maybe tomorrow? To meet with the VP?"
On Wednesday I went on my first job interview in a long while. I borrowed a button-down from my roommate, put on a nice skirt and decided against heels because they gave my outfit a "naughty librarian" vibe that I didn't want to make a first impression with. I went to the interview and I immediately loved the VP and not in a weird way but in a "this lady is really awesome" kind of way. Before leaving she asked me to email her a list of references and I left feeling pretty good about the whole thing but knowing that it would likely be weeks before I heard anything.
This morning I got a call from the VP as soon as I got to work and......
This is my "I got a new job!" face
On Friday I got a call around 5:45pm about a job. I called back and got voicemail. So I decided I would deal with it on Monday.
On Monday I'd kind of forgotten that I ever got that Friday evening call and I didn't get a return call so I figured it was a wash.
On Tuesday I found out that my show isn't getting renewed and that my last day of work would be March 20th. I immediately began to panic and was already imagining myself living in a shanty town in Central Park and hunting squirrel meat. So I called the woman from Friday back even though I felt like a douche because I hadn't tried her on Monday. Turns out she was very nice and informed me that she had my resume for a position that was opening up at the History Channel and that they were doing phone interviews and would probably be calling people in within the next couple of weeks. We chatted for ten minutes or so and before she hung up she said, "I'll probably give you a ring next week to let you know either way if we're going to have you come in for a one on one."
Ten minutes after that my interviewer called again. "Actually, do you have time this week to come in? Like maybe tomorrow? To meet with the VP?"
On Wednesday I went on my first job interview in a long while. I borrowed a button-down from my roommate, put on a nice skirt and decided against heels because they gave my outfit a "naughty librarian" vibe that I didn't want to make a first impression with. I went to the interview and I immediately loved the VP and not in a weird way but in a "this lady is really awesome" kind of way. Before leaving she asked me to email her a list of references and I left feeling pretty good about the whole thing but knowing that it would likely be weeks before I heard anything.
This morning I got a call from the VP as soon as I got to work and......
I start March 2nd!
This is my "I got a new job!" face
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Best line of the Housewives
There's only more episode left of the Real Housewives of Orange County--this makes my heart sad but the NY housewives premiere their 2nd season next week so I'm happy again.
In last night's episode Tamra went to Iowa to see her dad and in the process meet some family she didn't know. Her son Ryan came along and they all had a big family dinner. Ryan sat by his newfound cousin Nancy--an elegant piece of work in her late forties who looks like she has a penchant for cigarettes and drive-thrus. Ryan and Nancy proceed to "flirt" and make me want to throw up in my mouth. He says that older men are usually drawn to him, she says she like young boys who are "high" and "tight." She then says:
"I have a mouse right here." She points to her upper thigh.
"Where? Where?" Ryan asks
And in her raspy Natural Lite tinged breath she says,
In last night's episode Tamra went to Iowa to see her dad and in the process meet some family she didn't know. Her son Ryan came along and they all had a big family dinner. Ryan sat by his newfound cousin Nancy--an elegant piece of work in her late forties who looks like she has a penchant for cigarettes and drive-thrus. Ryan and Nancy proceed to "flirt" and make me want to throw up in my mouth. He says that older men are usually drawn to him, she says she like young boys who are "high" and "tight." She then says:
"I have a mouse right here." She points to her upper thigh.
"Where? Where?" Ryan asks
And in her raspy Natural Lite tinged breath she says,
"Pussy must have ate it."
Don't believe me?
Watch this and ff to around the 40 second mark.
Then you can grapple with the decision to laugh hysterically or throw up in your mouth.
Don't believe me?
Watch this and ff to around the 40 second mark.
Then you can grapple with the decision to laugh hysterically or throw up in your mouth.
Monday, February 09, 2009
Blackberry Messaging
For those of you who don't have Blackberries, there's the really great Blackberry-0nly feature called Blackberry messenger. It's like IM but only for people who have Blackberries. It's very exclusive and awesome so FUCK YOU iPhone.
My friend Christos loves awards shows and usually we watch together. But for the Grammys last night we were apart. But thanks to Blackberry Messenger it was like he was sitting right next to me:
*Note on BBM I am Miss Brandy, Christos is Puntie. Never explaining why.
On Justin Timberlake
Miss Brandy: I can't believe I used to honestly love Justin Timberlake.
Puntie: He has a dick for a face
Miss Brandy: Very astute observation.
On the Jonas Brothers
Miss Brandy: I don't know how to feel about this but I know I want to stab the one in the vest
Puntie: Same but white shirt needs to be deflowered by I
Miss Brandy: I'm sad Stevie was reduced to this
On Katy Perry:
Puntie: Ps I fucked ur mom and I liked it even her mint flavored puntie. I fucked ur mom and I liked it hoped your brother's dick don't mind it. Needless the say it felt so wrong. It felt so right...
Miss Brandy: hahahahaha
Puntie: She's a wreck. Horrible
Miss Brandy: H.E.L.L.
Puntie: Omgomgomg she is done thank god. Yayy!!!
On John Mayer:
Puntie: He is. A homo.
Miss Brandy: I secretly love some of his songs
Puntie: Well you do love the gays and they love you!!!
On TI and Justin Timberlake:
Miss Brandy: Now this is a song I love. He makes me melt a lil
Puntie: I want him but ps they have at least jerked off together sorry to b the one to tell u
My friend Christos loves awards shows and usually we watch together. But for the Grammys last night we were apart. But thanks to Blackberry Messenger it was like he was sitting right next to me:
*Note on BBM I am Miss Brandy, Christos is Puntie. Never explaining why.
On Justin Timberlake
Miss Brandy: I can't believe I used to honestly love Justin Timberlake.
Puntie: He has a dick for a face
Miss Brandy: Very astute observation.
On the Jonas Brothers
Miss Brandy: I don't know how to feel about this but I know I want to stab the one in the vest
Puntie: Same but white shirt needs to be deflowered by I
Miss Brandy: I'm sad Stevie was reduced to this
On Katy Perry:
Puntie: Ps I fucked ur mom and I liked it even her mint flavored puntie. I fucked ur mom and I liked it hoped your brother's dick don't mind it. Needless the say it felt so wrong. It felt so right...
Miss Brandy: hahahahaha
Puntie: She's a wreck. Horrible
Miss Brandy: H.E.L.L.
Puntie: Omgomgomg she is done thank god. Yayy!!!
On John Mayer:
Puntie: He is. A homo.
Miss Brandy: I secretly love some of his songs
Puntie: Well you do love the gays and they love you!!!
On TI and Justin Timberlake:
Miss Brandy: Now this is a song I love. He makes me melt a lil
Puntie: I want him but ps they have at least jerked off together sorry to b the one to tell u
Blossom Dearie :(
I'll Take Manhattan is probably my favorite song ever. When I moved here and knew no one, my discman was my best friend. Yes it was 2004 and I was too poor for an ipod so yes. I had a discman. I did a lot of walking when I was new here and I Blossom Dearie came on a lot of those walks with me. The opening bars of I'll Take Manhattan remind me each time I listen of how much I love New York City.
Blossom Dearie died this weekend and if you've never heard of her you should check her out. She is an old school cabaret gal with the softest nicest voice you've ever heard and very jazzy piano in the background. She was 82 but still played a club in midtown and it's a big regret of mine now that I never made it out to see her.
I tried to find I'll Take Manhattan and youtube failed me. So here's another one of my favorites by her, "I Wish You Love"
Blossom Dearie died this weekend and if you've never heard of her you should check her out. She is an old school cabaret gal with the softest nicest voice you've ever heard and very jazzy piano in the background. She was 82 but still played a club in midtown and it's a big regret of mine now that I never made it out to see her.
I tried to find I'll Take Manhattan and youtube failed me. So here's another one of my favorites by her, "I Wish You Love"
Friday, February 06, 2009
Is it just me?
Isn't the octopulets mom just a little.....INSANE??
She already had 6 kids!! Is it wrong of me to think that maybe there should a limit on that kind of thing if doctors have to be involved? I mean at least Michelle Duggar had her 18 by luck of the "I'm so fertile" draw but I'm having trouble understanding why doctors let this lady get implanted again after she already had 6 kids. Did they forget that each of these kids will be a living breathing feeling human being who will need to be loved and cared for and known by his mother? People aren't meant to have litters and while I wish this "Octo-mom" the best, I think she's a dumb bitch and it will piss me off if she has her hand out for my tax dollars for these kids that she wanted so badly. I'm not trying to say that every kid should be raised in a two-parent home but a woman who had 6 kids voluntarily on her own and then tried for another set of multiples doesn't sound to me like she should be having any kids at all. And what kind of doctor sees that a woman has 6 young kids already and thinks it's a good idea to implant her with 6 more to see where it goes? I have a lot of questions and to be honest I don't care if I get the answers because the sooner this lady is out of the news, the better.
She already had 6 kids!! Is it wrong of me to think that maybe there should a limit on that kind of thing if doctors have to be involved? I mean at least Michelle Duggar had her 18 by luck of the "I'm so fertile" draw but I'm having trouble understanding why doctors let this lady get implanted again after she already had 6 kids. Did they forget that each of these kids will be a living breathing feeling human being who will need to be loved and cared for and known by his mother? People aren't meant to have litters and while I wish this "Octo-mom" the best, I think she's a dumb bitch and it will piss me off if she has her hand out for my tax dollars for these kids that she wanted so badly. I'm not trying to say that every kid should be raised in a two-parent home but a woman who had 6 kids voluntarily on her own and then tried for another set of multiples doesn't sound to me like she should be having any kids at all. And what kind of doctor sees that a woman has 6 young kids already and thinks it's a good idea to implant her with 6 more to see where it goes? I have a lot of questions and to be honest I don't care if I get the answers because the sooner this lady is out of the news, the better.
Thursday, February 05, 2009
Give Michael Phelps a break
He just broke a really awesome Olympic record.
Let the motherfucker take a bong hit or two!! I keep hearing all this "But he's a role model!! He's getting millions to be a role model!"
What. Ever. He is a rich kid in his early 20s--be glad he wasn't doing coke off a stripper's big fake tit.
Speaking of Michael Phelps......
Let the motherfucker take a bong hit or two!! I keep hearing all this "But he's a role model!! He's getting millions to be a role model!"
What. Ever. He is a rich kid in his early 20s--be glad he wasn't doing coke off a stripper's big fake tit.
Speaking of Michael Phelps......
Pooh on touching.
sidenote: The theme song of this show is stuck in my head sometimes. Along with the theme from Animaniacs.
Brandy rants.
A quote from Bill O'Reilly from the Early Show on CBS--
"But for President Obama to expect the nation and the Republican Party to accept a bill that (House Speaker) Nancy Pelosi and the far left put together that rewards unions, that spends billions on global warming research, that goes into all kinds of social engineering -- if Barack Obama thought the American people, who are really suffering, were going to take all of this and say, 'Oh, yeah!' he's not living in the real world. So, it's partially his fault for not understanding the mood of the nation right now."
Now I don't usually get into politics on this blog. I like to keep things short and funny--I don't like ugly. Politics turns people ugly. But I'm sorry I need to get ugly for a moment.
Bill O'Reilly is a Piece Of Shit. Rewarding unions? Spending billions on global warming research? THOSE ARE GREAT IDEAS and I don't mind my tax money being spent on it. Unions look out for their workers and make sure they aren't RAPED by their companies. My mother, my grandmother and my grandfather have been union members my whole life and it's those unions that are behind them keeping their same jobs for 25 years (my mom) and 40 years (my grandparents). Oh and spending money on global warming is the liberal left trying to waste tax payer dollars? Well you know what's NOT okay? 70 degree days in January and Category 5 Hurricanes in the Gulf of Mexico that destroy cities. Researching to maybe find a way to keep that from happening seems to me like a really great plan. I think Obama understands the mood of the country quite well. People are scared and broke and they want answers and I really believe he is trying to give them to us. Bush got us into a war for no reason and spent (is spending) a SHITLOAD of money on it. Think of how much better along we'd be if all that money spent in Iraq hat benefits fucking Dick Cheney and his cronies was actually spent on finding ways to make cars more energy efficient and expanding public transportation in all major cities. Or maybe if some of that money had been spent on repairing our healthcare system--it's just not okay that America has such shitty standards for healthcare reform.
Barack Obama is not a god. He is not Jesus come back to save the righteous. He is a man who has been given the incredibly daunting and scary task of putting one of the world's superpowers back on the right track. I think that right wingers are trying to set him up as this god-like figure so that everytime he's not perfect they can tear him down. So yeah he made a couple ill informed choices for a few cabinet picks. Are you telling me that Tom Daschle not paying his taxes is on par with John Ashcroft turning the Justice Department into an untouchable department that engages in about a million and a half REALLY SKETCH activities that usually involve fucking people's civil liberties over? I don't think so.
Okay that's my rant.
PS: Whenever I am feeling angry I go to Sean Hannity's website and send mean emails.
"But for President Obama to expect the nation and the Republican Party to accept a bill that (House Speaker) Nancy Pelosi and the far left put together that rewards unions, that spends billions on global warming research, that goes into all kinds of social engineering -- if Barack Obama thought the American people, who are really suffering, were going to take all of this and say, 'Oh, yeah!' he's not living in the real world. So, it's partially his fault for not understanding the mood of the nation right now."
Now I don't usually get into politics on this blog. I like to keep things short and funny--I don't like ugly. Politics turns people ugly. But I'm sorry I need to get ugly for a moment.
Bill O'Reilly is a Piece Of Shit. Rewarding unions? Spending billions on global warming research? THOSE ARE GREAT IDEAS and I don't mind my tax money being spent on it. Unions look out for their workers and make sure they aren't RAPED by their companies. My mother, my grandmother and my grandfather have been union members my whole life and it's those unions that are behind them keeping their same jobs for 25 years (my mom) and 40 years (my grandparents). Oh and spending money on global warming is the liberal left trying to waste tax payer dollars? Well you know what's NOT okay? 70 degree days in January and Category 5 Hurricanes in the Gulf of Mexico that destroy cities. Researching to maybe find a way to keep that from happening seems to me like a really great plan. I think Obama understands the mood of the country quite well. People are scared and broke and they want answers and I really believe he is trying to give them to us. Bush got us into a war for no reason and spent (is spending) a SHITLOAD of money on it. Think of how much better along we'd be if all that money spent in Iraq hat benefits fucking Dick Cheney and his cronies was actually spent on finding ways to make cars more energy efficient and expanding public transportation in all major cities. Or maybe if some of that money had been spent on repairing our healthcare system--it's just not okay that America has such shitty standards for healthcare reform.
Barack Obama is not a god. He is not Jesus come back to save the righteous. He is a man who has been given the incredibly daunting and scary task of putting one of the world's superpowers back on the right track. I think that right wingers are trying to set him up as this god-like figure so that everytime he's not perfect they can tear him down. So yeah he made a couple ill informed choices for a few cabinet picks. Are you telling me that Tom Daschle not paying his taxes is on par with John Ashcroft turning the Justice Department into an untouchable department that engages in about a million and a half REALLY SKETCH activities that usually involve fucking people's civil liberties over? I don't think so.
Okay that's my rant.
PS: Whenever I am feeling angry I go to Sean Hannity's website and send mean emails.
Tuesday, February 03, 2009
I went to the dentist today
And it's going to be a long few months for my teeth. But after they will be even more amazing.
In honor of my dentist visit, here's David.
In honor of my dentist visit, here's David.
So wrong
But also funny.
My grandmother recently got a handicapped parking pass and it's kind of amazing.
Monday, February 02, 2009
Tina Fey read my resume.
I didn't get the job--but I wasn't expecting to. What matters about is this: Tina Fey read my resume and wants to know if it's okay with me to keep it on file.
Am I insane and much too optimistic for thinking that Tina Fey reading my resume is so awesome?
I'm even totally over stupid Puxa-whatever Phil saying that winter is here to stay.
Oh sorry I died for a second. I'm back now.
Am I insane and much too optimistic for thinking that Tina Fey reading my resume is so awesome?
I'm even totally over stupid Puxa-whatever Phil saying that winter is here to stay.
I'm now having a Great Monday.
I google imaged "I feel great" and this came up.
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